Kelsey Stillwell

December 2010

Peace. It sure can come in some of the most unexpected ways, and at times when it seems impossible to find any reassurance.  Through the comforting words of a mother, God showed me peace amidst one of the scariest times of my life. 

Lying on an uncomfortable hospital bed, shaking, not saying a word, because I know speaking will bring tears and my cracked voice will show my fear; I waited relentlessly for a nurse to tell me what comes next. As I waited, my fears over took me. 

This was about a year and a half ago when I had back surgery.  Looking back on it now, my anxiety seems so small, but at the time, it was the most scared I have ever felt. And it was there that God revealed to me how powerful God’s peace can be.  While all of the worst outcomes ran through my head, my mom held my hand with tears in her eyes and said, “You know I would take your place if I could.”  These few words hit me like lightning and gave me peace in the most unexpected way, by breaking my walls down.  I finally let myself show how I actually felt, scared to death. I cried to God, and told God how much I was afraid. There is something comforting about just letting yourself share your pain and worries with God and know that God is listening.